a deeply serious page

Fish

If you know me well enough, you know I'm into fish.

Not the eating kind. The staring-into-the-tank-for-an-hour-forgetting-I-had-plans kind. This page has no purpose. Neither do fish, arguably, and yet.

fish i respect

A non-exhaustive ranking of legends

01

Mantis shrimp

Technically not a fish. Sees 16 colour channels. Can throw a punch that boils water. We do not speak ill of the mantis shrimp.

02

Anglerfish

Brings its own lamp into the abyss and asks no one for permission. Aspirational.

03

Pufferfish

Solves every problem by becoming a sphere. Honestly, same.

04

Clownfish

Lives inside something that would dissolve you, and calls it home. Unbothered. Moisturised.

05

Koi

A swimming mood-ring that will outlive you, your car, and possibly this website.

frequently (n)ever asked

Do you actually own fish?
That's between me and my electricity bill.
Favourite fish?
Whichever one is currently ignoring me.
Is this page necessary?
Is any of this?
Can I touch the fish?
They are made of math. But sure, hover over them.

Thank you for visiting the fish. The fish thank you back, in their own way, which is by ignoring you.